It had been such a rough day.
Thomas Beck pushed back his chair and stood up sharply. His empty coffee cup clattered against the numerous pens in his briefcase. Sweeping off several messy papers from his desk he jammed them in with the rest of the chaos.
Well, it certainly wouldn’t do just to stay around and gloom. There was nothing else he could do about the situation but wait.
Work at the journaling office had never been this frustrating, but Thomas felt he almost didn’t care. And yet, at the same time he cared so much he could run five miles without stopping.
A brief thought flickered through his mind. With all this stress …does God really care?
Snatching his hat from the post at the door he didn’t even glance up when a coworker made a sound as if to ask him a question.
No. Thomas thought. I’ve got no time for questions–even if they are meant for my well-being! They just won’t understand.
Marching premptorily down several flights of steps, Thomas passed the bank tellers which worked below their office. The young men were busy with their numerous jobs.
Thomas noticed one of the young men looking especially troubled, but he brushed it off. The boy probably just needed rest like he did.
I just don’t get enough time to myself. He muttered inwardly. I sacrifice all my time just to get these stories out for others. It’s ridiculous–why am I even in this job?
He would take a walk down near the river. He needed some of those clear, cool breezes to calm the turmoil inside.
Several fall leaves skipped before him, flickering with each turn of the breeze. The air smelled moist and crisp–a perfect, blustery fall day.
Thomas felt braced by the cold wind and rejoiced at how it numbed his toes and fingers. It was a relief to focus on something else than his worries and discouragements.
I wonder if anybody is even truly helped by what I write?! He agonized. I mean, it’s just hard, cold, facts with a slight sweetener called the storyline to make it palatable.
He bent his head to keep the wind from his eyes as it was blowing rather fiercely now. There were two pathways by the river, and Thomas took the upper one, as the one closer to the river tended to be better travelled and he wanted to avoid meeting anybody.
I need time for myself, he mumbled, pulling his coat closer.
The sound of a joyful bird song and a little gasp of delight made Thomas turn as he walked. The noise had come from his right, on the trail he had avoided.
Slowing his pace as he looked, he finally stopped, holding onto his hat as the thick fabric caught a crosswind.
It was a little girl, not yet out of her singe digit years, bending down close to something on the sidewalk. And then a flutter of wings and a little sparrow landed on her hand.
As the scene played out before him, Thomas suddenly caught his breath.
Just yesterday he had referred in an article to a Scripture verse his mother had faithfully taught him.
Phrasing it in his own words, he whispered. “We are more precious than the sparrow, yet God sees even when a sparrow falls.”
How much more–
Thomas caught himself, and then relaxed. No, it was true. How much more valuable was he?
God cared.
Abruptly turning from the sight, Thomas made sudden gestures over his face, hoping that no one could see the tears start.
Walking slowly, Thomas’ thoughts were far away from the winding sidewalk. If God cared so much for the sparrow, what did that mean for His value placed on His people?
“Oh forgive me, Heavenly Father,” Thomas prayed fervently, “for my bad attitude, my selfish thoughts, for …for not valuing myself and others the way you do.”
As Thomas prayed, a new strength seemed to light within him. And a completely new set of desires sprang up in his heart. After a few moments, Thomas stopped. Then turning slowly on his heel, he started walking back from where he came.
Then his walk was stronger, then faster.
With a sudden zeal, Thomas burst back into the office building. He had to speak with that bank teller who looked troubled. The boy needed someone to speak with him–why, that boy was valuable, he couldn’t be lost!
And his boss! The man who had so frustrated him an hour before. Thomas’ eyes brightened with hope. He’d never seen the boss as precious in God’s sight–why oh why had he simply left in a fume as though the boss was some sort of annoying fly, rather than a human being loved by God?
His hat fell off in his hurry, but Thomas didn’t notice. His heart began to leap, and energy surged through his being. There were so many precious souls–valuable souls to care for!
And at that moment, a little girl skipped under the bridge and out of sight.
“Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.” Matthew 10:29-31
“Jesus saith unto them, My meat is to do the will of him that sent me, and to finish his work.” John 4:34
